Party of regrets

In a movie I saw ages back, a young woman asks her mother what she regrets most. The young woman carried a big regret. As luck would have it, in the world of the silver screen, she got a chance to undo her past! But that's not what I remember fondly of the flick.

What stuck with me was her mother’s response, “I don’t have any regrets.”

Wow, that’s the way to live life, I thought.

And here I am, years later, sometimes feeling weighed down by regrets. Tiny things, big things, sometimes they pile up. I regret hitting snooze this morning, skipping my workout. I regret not answering my grandma's call the other day. I regret stopping my YouTube channel two years back.

The biggest regret of all

The thing with regrets is not just the regrets themselves. It's also the regret of having regrets in life that weighs you down.

Just like the wise mother in the movie, it seems that happy people don’t carry regrets. The successful businesswoman you admire doesn't have regrets. That athlete who inspires you to push harder doesn't carry regrets. Right?

Here's a secret — Everyone has regrets. From eating that extra slice of pizza last night to not starting your podcast two years ago, from not taking that holiday with friends to staying too long in a job that didn't fulfill you, from forgetting to call your cousin on her birthday to buying those expensive shoes that you never wear, everyone has regrets.

If everyone's regrets suddenly appeared on their social media status, the sheer volume of ‘what-ifs’ and ‘if-onlys’ would crash the servers!

It would be nice, though. It would tell us that we're not alone in this regret party. Even the super fit, super popular TikToker has regrets?! I’m not doing so bad then. I don’t need to be so harsh on myself.

It’s only human to question your past decisions. It’s okay to forgive yourself for having regrets. In fact, that’s the first step in moving beyond the 'regret party.'

Once you forgive yourself for carrying regrets, you'll find it easier to take the next step - Recognizing your regrets.

Good old paper to the rescue

Let's pull those regrets out into the light. Maybe you skipped your gym sessions this year, or you didn't speak up in a meeting. For everything that’s bothering you in health, wealth, or family fronts, list them down on a sheet of paper.

Next step - On another sheet of paper, list a learning from each regret. Perhaps you realized the value of setting a consistent workout schedule, or you recognized the importance of voicing your ideas in meetings.

Now comes the best part. I bet you saw this coming, didn't you? Burn the regrets sheet to ashes. Yes, I mean take a matchstick and light it on fire! 🔥

Put up the learnings sheet where you can see it every day. Those are the real gems, your stepping stones. They're the wisdom you've gained through the school of life.

Remember, it’s natural to have regrets. It’s remarkable to have learned from them. So let's turn those regrets into learnings, and keep moving forward with a lighter heart and a wiser mind in the new year ahead of us.